Srednivashtar

It's 5.17 AM and my roommates are STILL up. I am just having my breakfast and getting ready for work and they have been up and talking all night. I had earplugs in but that wasn't enough.

As long as everything goes as plan there's only 8 more working days till I move, and then this should be over forever.

I bought an apartment. I bought and apartment! I BOUGHT AN APARTMENT!!!

Loan approval came through today. Settlement is scheduled for late this month. Hopefully everything runs smoothly from here on.

It's really tiny but in a nice location and I'm so excited. I'll post photos sonn.

...

I BOUGHT AN APARTMENT!

Okaaaaaay...
So at first I told myself I wasn't going to write about this here because most of my entries lately have been negative, and what with the intenet being the home of drama-queens I thought it might make my situation worse buuuut no one even remotely involved with the sitation reads this and I'm feeling pretty tense and upset and alone so here I am again...venting my spleen.

First, a bit of background information:
-Three of my four housemates are on holidays at the moment just leaving me, my (exclusively indoor) cat and the housemate I know the least but who I always thought seemed kind of cool and nice, always seems to be smiling, (let's call him "Guy"). Guy works rotating shifts at a casino so he works very strange and ever-changing hours.I hardly ever see him.
-When I first moved into this place with my cat I made it clear to every one he was an indoor cat and EVERYONE said it wouldn't be a problem to kee the doors closed. Since I (and my cat) got back after Christmas I discovered Guy has been leaving the back door and the back screen door open,even when e's asleep and sometimes when he's not even at home. I hadn't really run into him and was a bit shy to talk to him so, on the advic of my bofriend, left a note stuck to the back flyscreen door that read "Please leave fly screen closed so jinx does't escape. Thanks, Katherine".
-With four 20-something-year-old men in the house,I'm sureyou can imagine the house got prett dirt. In fact, in my opinion it was filthy.I thought it would be a good idea for me to have a big clean up while most of my housemates were away. My Mum offered to help and so when she dropped meback home after the Christmas holidays we cleaned the kitchen thoroughly as well as mine and Evan's room. In retrospect, even though I hardy see or speak to Guy I still should have triedto let him know I was going to clean the kitchen. Never having lived in a shared house before I just didn't think that cleaning could upset anone but I would definitely do things differently next time.

NOW, the actual story:
I woke up at about 12.40 on Friday morning when Guy came home. No big deal, I usually wake up when someone gets in the front door and then just roll over and go to sleep. It is, however, hard to roll over and go to sleep when your housemate walks i the door and, while standing directly outside your bedroom door says to the person beside him loudly and with venom, "My FUCKING housemate!" and then in a low hiss (with no less venom) continues on to complain about how "I got up this morning and there was a note stuck to the door..." and continues on angrily to talk about me cleaning the house with Mum. This went on for some time. I was alone. I was terrified (most poeple who have met me will know I'm a VERY timid person).

To top it off they then proceeded to play rock music loudly right through until 5am wen I tried to get up for work and, instead, in tears, called in sick. Guy knew I had work that day. They also seemingly turned the volume of the computer right up and played something on it that makes a loud beeping noise every few seconds. They have also occassionally strummed at the guitar. I already had my door closed and I put my earplugs in but it didn't make much difference as Jack's door was wide open.

When I got up the back door and screen door were open again. I took the note down.

I have arranged to stay for a few days at the house of one of m boyfriend's friends. Unfortunately this person is also a friend of Guy and called guy to see what was going on. Guy approached me, all smiles and confusion,to ask what was wrong. I told him hat I had been awake when he came home on Friday and that I heard what he said and that, to be honest,it mademe really uncomfortable. His reply was "Oh.I wasn't aware I'd said anything"

I don't think anyone has been deliberately this nasty to me since high school. I don't think I've EVER met anyone this passive-aggressive.

So that's what's going on. I'm praying that this doesn't escalate into a massive drama but I think tha Guy is going to do his best to try and turn this all back on me.

I'm really scared. I really really am. I feel so alone. I just ant Evan to get home.

Another dollar per hour, that is! :S

Yesterday was officially 6 months since I started working and I also found out that as of next week my wage is going up by another dollar an hour. That makes 3 pay-raises in 6 months.

I guess they are compensating me for the fact that, because of staff shortages, they have put me on what is apparently third-year apprentice work when I am only in my first year. I'm pretty chuffed.

Still,I wish I wasn't doing all this over-time. I'm doing around 16 hours of overtime a week. I can't wait till Christmas.

Okay so...deliberately and maliciously spreading a rumour (false) that a particular guy in your group of friends raped you is...bad...right?

And then doing the same thing to another guy a few years down the line...wouldn't that make it even worse?

Well apparently not! Not according to my boy's friends anyway! (well, excepting the ones who this happened to...I know that at least one of them is still pissed off)

So not only is my boyfriend REALLY close friends with this girl (a fact he somehow forgot to mention at any point over the last ummmm...18 months?) but after first saying that it was actually another girl who did these things (I made it very clear to him that no, this was definitely the right girl) be then backflips and says he has no knowledge of these events having taken place.

Of course all of his friends that live down our area seem to know about it. This includes the friends he lived with for about 5 years.

Seriously, am I going insane? Am I the only person who thinks that what this girl did was...disgusting? Despicable? Evil?

*sigh* Deep breaths. Count to ten.

I went to the doctor again on Monday and waited an hour after my appointment time to see the nurse. She took my bandages off and both she and the doctor said I would take the "stery-strips" off on Wednesday. So on Wednesday night I soaked the stripe off in warm water. Everything seemed fine.

I got back from work late last night because I had to go to a paper-decorating class (part of my apprenticeship). Shortly after I got home our new room-mate arrived (he seems nice) and while we were all standing around talking my arm brushed against Evan's...and apparently that was enough to knock the adhesive that was holding my nail together clear off.

It started bleeding. I started screaming and panicking. In the end we bandaged the thumb up and that seemed to stop the bleeding so I didn't bother going to casualty. I have to go to the doctor today. I'm not sure if they're going to try and glue back the nail or cut it off. :S

I had to call my boss to tell him I was going to the doctor. He said it was a WorkCover thing and that if I kept my receipts they'd reimburse me and to let him know what happens "When you're done or on Monday". So I'm going to try and see the doctor as soon as possible, but I don't think I'll be going back to work after that. I feel really awful about that because things are really busy at work at the moment...but I just don't think I'd be any use today, especially when it's my early-finish day.

I'm so pissed off because I followed ALL the instructions left to me my the doctor and the nurse and now this happens...GRRR!

So I'm home from work early today. About 2 and a half hours into the day I was trying to trim the paper lining on a piece of board from an album when my right hand slipped and I sliced right through my left thumb nail with my stanley knife. I mean RIGHT through.

So much blood!

Someone from work bandaged me up and then I was dropped off at the medical clinic with the instructions "They know us there, so just tell them what happened and they'll sort you out. You won't have to pay. Get them to give us a call and we'll send someone around to pick you up."

As it turns out they had no doctor in that day (only a psychologist) and I had to walk to the next closest clinic, feeling dazed from shock and pain. When I got there they told me I had to pay upfront and I burst into tears because I had left my wallet under my bench at work. After a couple of phone calls to my work (yes, it took more than one) it finally got sorted out.

When the nurse took my bandages off I was still bleeding. A lot. In the end they had to put glue on both the nail and some of my skin on the thumb and then dress it. I gotta tell you, it looks pretty gory under there. The dressings have to stay on for at least 5 weeks.

I'll be back at work tomorrow.

Quick! Shower me with sympathy (and, ideally, chocolates)

I have the best boyfriend in the world. Do you know what he bought me when he was filming this week? That's right...a can of Tab!

I've been saving it till he was finished on the film. He finished yesterday so we're going to drink it today.

I don't even know what flavour Tab is supposed to be :S

Okay, so recently I've been really panicking about what the future hold for me. This all basically started two weeks ago when I found out that one of my work mates works from 6am to 5pm Monday to Friday. I thought I was doing too much work when I started doing 4-9 hours overtime a week but...damn, that's just ridiculous!

Then, a few days later my bus driver decides to stroke up a conversation during the course of which he tells me he works from 5.45am to around 5pm SIX OR SEVEN DAYS A WEEK! When I commented that that seemed like a lot he replied that "It's too much, but I have to do it".

This got me panicking. I started to become terrified that I was going to become one of these people that subsists rather than lives. Let's face it, even after my apprnticeship it's not like I'll be earning much as a hand bookbinder. So, I think it's about time I looked at my life goals, both big and small, and started thinking about what isn't feasible and start genuinely working towards the things that ARE, so I don't end up in the trap of working my whole life a way to pay for a house I couldn't really afford or something.

Here are some preliminary thoughts:

-Breed Manx cats: This is something I think I'm going to have to scratch entirely.Breeding cats is an INCREDIBLY expensive hobby and I think will be out of my means, even as a retirement project.
-Keep bees: Okay, this one was less a "dream" than an oddly persistent whim so it's not too card to scrap this idea.
-Raise chickens: This one was one of my fondest dreams to raise my own chickens for eggs and meat...so for the moment I'm still clinging to it as a maybe. This will be dependent on whether I buy a house, where and what sort.
-Buy a house: For my whole life I have wanted this more than anything...but seeing the amount some people around my are paying on mortgages I'm starting to doubt this will ever happen for me. The way I see it now I have only two feasible option, either I rent forever or I buy a VERY small and VERY cheap house. I'm not going to buy the "house of my dreams" if I have to work so much to pay it off that I don't even get to live in it.
-Travel overseas: This is perhaps the least realstic of my dreams and yet despite this, and despite the fact that it is not even my FONDEST dream, this is the one I am going to cling to the strongest. I am bonded to Seldex for another four years, but after that I am going to go to Germany for a while. And why? Because I don't want to become an empty husk, just going from work to home again in an endless cycle. Because everyone deserves an adventure! And why Germany?...I'll go into that in another post.
-Learn to drive: I wish I had a good reason to scrap this one. It's not a dream. It's something I have to do. Damnit.
-Get married: Slipping this one in at the bottom because I'm sure everyone's stopped reading by know :P. I've found the person I want to spend my life with...but whether this will happen is not a certainty. I think he feels the same way about me but money is becoming an issue.
-Write a book of short stories: Will I ever feel inspired again?

Okay, I guess those are all the main long-term plans addressed. At least I managed to ditch a few things so that's...slightly more realistic than it was. Now to start thinking about some of my more immediate plans and reassessing my financial situation. Fun!

After a longer stay than expected at the vet Jinx is finally home! The vet says he's still very sick, but let us take him home because he's finally eating a bit. He's on two different types of antibiotics as well as appetite stimulants.

They still have no idea what's really wrong with him. His blood test showed that he's mildly anemic and there's been some damage to his red blood cells but they've no idea what the cause is. He's a bit wobbly on his feet, too, because he's been losing protein and the muscles in his legs have become weakened.

I'm still really worried about him, but at least he's home now so I can keep an eye on him and give him lots of cuddles. The vet is calling tomorrow to arrange another appointment.

Jinx is staying at the vet overnight. They're putting him on a drip. I thought he was getting better since our last visit but he's actually gotten much, much worse. He now weighs only 2.45kg and is very dehydrated. The vets don't know what's wrong. They're going to do lots of tests...just to try and find what's wrong. I'm so scared. When Charlie died earlier this year it broke my heart, I don't know what I'll do if Jinx dies. I LITERALLY don't know what I'd do.

EDIT: Okay, so I just got off the phone to tell Mum about it and I now feel even worse. She started to cry as well and told me the "He might not be okay" and to "make sure you prepare yourself". I know she's right but it just hurts so much to hear it. Also, there's no-one sympathetic at work. When I told one of my co-workers that I had to take my cat to the vet he said "It's just a cat, you can get another one" and "There's too many of them anyway" (no, he wasn't joking, not even ion a tasteless way. He really was completely shocked that I would bother taking an animal to a vet)

Well, I had my first week of work today and I must say I was pretty happy with it all. Everyone was so friendly and helpful, although I can't really remember anyone's names apart from the Boss (I THINK the guy who works at the bench opposite me is called Drew, and I'm pretty sure my supervisor is "Trent"...but it could be "Trav". I think I'll just continue mumbling his name until I hear someone else say it.)

I spent most of the week putting buckram covers on boards that are to be turned into presentation folders for DVDs. The only thing is, my boss and supervisor keep throwing different jobs at me because everyone seems really concerned that I'll get bored, when to be honest I'd rather focus on one thing to begin with and get really good at that before moving on...oh well.

Drew told me some amusing stories about the pranks they used to play on apprentices which included asking them to fetch the can of multi-coloured spray-paint, or else being sent to another of the workers to ask for a "long weight".  I'm yet to suffer anything like this myself.

The only thing that bothers me is some of the photos pinned up near my bench. Someone has glued up various photos of women barely-clad in bikinis bending over in rather suggestive poses. While this isn't exactly my preferred viewing at work it wouldn't really bother me if it weren't for the largish photo of a bare-breasted woman holding a sheet just over her crotch. It's not a big deal or anything and it's not as though I'm going to make a complaint, it's just a little awkward sometimes when I have to deliberately look for somewhere else to look. Does that seem uptight of me?

Next week I'm going to see if I can take some photos of my work bench. I'll post them if I do.

Oh, and in case anyone's interested here's the website of the company I'm apprenticed to: http://www.seldex.com.au/

It seems as though I've been offered a hand-bookbinding apprenticeship at a business that specialises in making top-of-the-line wedding and portrait albums. This all happened very suddenly and I don't quite feel like the news has hit me yet. I have to telephone the business manager tomorrow to accept the position and see when he wants me to start.

Unfortunately this will mean I will have to talk to the company I only JUST started work experience with to tell them I have had another offer and will not be returning, which will be awkward and also a little sad because it seemed like a really fun and relaxed place to work.

I'm so excited...but also very scared. I'll be sure to post another entry after my first day of work.

Yay! I had the tonsilectomy on Thursday morning at around 10am and started to recover quickly enough to get sent home Friday morning. I am officially in love with Janine and Jane, the day and night nurses respectively, who were very sweet and brought me painkillers at regular intervals.

The downside is I think I may have developed a small infection. I am feeling significantly worse today than I did on Friday. It has gotten to the point where it is even getting too painful for me to swallow yoghurt. Also my ears have been hurting a lot and now have that funny feeling they get when they're water-logged. I'm going to call my doctor first thing tomorrow for an emergency appointment to figure out exactly what's wrong.

Also on the negative side, as a result of not being able to eat properly I've lost 3kg...and I was at and maintaining my ideal weight! It won't be difficult to put them back on again when I'm better, but it may prove challenging to put on JUST 3 kilos. Oh well, I'm sure it will get sorted eventually when I get on real food again. I am getting rather anxious about food lately, though. everyone either seems to be telling me either that I'm unhealthily and unattractively skinny or that I overeat. both of these can't be true and personally I didn't think either were true. Attractiveness, of course is subjective...but I'm sure I'm not "skinny" and I had reached what I thought was a comfortable weight for me and seemed to be maintaining it well. As for eating, well, I do eat a lot more than my room-mates but I don't think it's an unhealthy amount and it's certainly less junk food and more fruit and vegetables than I used to eat at home. I don't know, though, recent comments are just starting to make me...uncomfortable and embarrassed, I guess.

It was my birthday yesterday, but I think I'll celebrate it another day...you know, when I can have cake. My boyfriend was really sweet and came up from melbourneto stay with me for a few days while I recover. also, he bought my 'Spyro' for the DS and a DVD set of the first season of 'The Addams Family'...I do so love the Addams family.

Can you tell I'm on painkillers? I think I may be starting to ramble...